AEAE INSIDER REPORT – BRITISH AGENCY RELEASES NEW MANDATORY ETIQUETTE RULES FOR BRITS - Americans for the Enforcement of Attorney Ethics

AEAE INSIDER REPORT – BRITISH AGENCY RELEASES NEW MANDATORY ETIQUETTE RULES FOR BRITS

8/15/2010

LONDON-(AEAE)-THE AMERICANS FOR THE ENFORCEMENT OF ATTORNEY ETHICS (AEAE) IS PREPARING TO OFFER ITS MEMBERS DISCOUNTED FLIGHTS AND CRUSES TO ENGLAND FOR THE 2012 LONDON OLYMPICS. AEAE was able to obtain an early list of New Rules of etiquette that the London National Tourism Agency will release next week. The following partial list of “New” Rules that have the Force of Law are designed to help create a “warm” welcome for visitors ahead of the 2010 London Olympics.

Avoid saying “thank you” to a Chinese compliment. Instead, politely deny the compliment to show humility.
Never call a Canadian an American. Canadians take offense at being mistaken for U.S. Citizens. Call them Canucks.
Never imply that people from Poland drink excessively, despite the well known stereotype.
Avoid winking at someone from Hong Kong, because it’s considered rude. Stick you tongue out instead which is not considered offensive, but a show of affection.
Do not try to help a Japanese person cross a street, they can see out of those eyes.
Remember a smiling Japanese person is not necessarily happy; they tend to smile when angry, embarrassed or disappointed. And do not remind them of World War II, or what happened to Nagasaki or Hiroshima.
Do not forget that the cold war is over. Treat Russians with respect. But report any Russian that is seen near a military instillation.
Remember to treat each Arab with respect too. They are not “all” terrorist, except those that may have something in their hands or look like they have a bulged under their shirt.
It rumored that Osama Ben Laden may visit the 2012 London Olympics. If anyone see him or anyone looks like him please report it to the authorities
Never call a Chinese person a “Goog!”
Remember the American Revolution “Never” took place. We still own America. Please do not refer to Barak Obama as a Schvartze.
Anyone who knowingly violates these etiquette rules is subject to a 500 pound fine and 6 month sentence to clean the tower of London and it has not been cleaned for Centuries. GOD SAVE THE QUEEN

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